Hello my loves, how are you all doing today? How is your week going? I have family coming to visit me next week so am busy trying to get everything sorted before that, and some upcoming fairs I also have scheduled. I am making some progress catching up with this Blog, which I'm pleased about. It helps that I have done very little this year, and don't have much to share, haha!
April is my birthday month, and though I didn't have any fun trips planned this year, I did make an effort to treat myself when I could. After all, if I don't, who will?! So I have some pics of nice meals and drinks that I enjoyed when I left the house. (I would like to point out that they were all spread over different days!) I also saw a few friends, and there were some family gatherings. Sadly, one of my Uncles died that month, after suffering from Alzheimers for a number of years, so some of the gatherings were sad ones. Once again, I was grateful that I live so much closer now, and was able to travel to Derry for the funeral. It was a beautiful service, and I was glad I could be there for my family.
As you can see, I made it down to the shore a couple of times during spells of good weather, and I went for some lovely walks. You might be surprised to see some sunrise pics though, since I am not usually up that early. Well, I have not been sleeping at all well lately. I have always struggled with sleep, and my health conditions make that infinitely worse. On top of which, I am now perimenopausal, which also affects your sleep patterns. Suffice to say, I'm sleeping worse than usual. So, the only reason I have any sunrise pics, is because I was still awake from the night before! But I was treated to some beautiful views, so that helps make up for it.
On my actual birthday at the end of the month, I treated myself to a delicious meal at Nancy's Barn, and a couple of drinks out. I was craving seafood, as I often do, and the chef at Nancy's put a beautiful plate of prawn and crab salad, seafood chowder, and chips together for me. And I was also presented with some ice cream, complete with a candle, while the servers sang happy birthday to me, which made me feel very special! I couldn't help but feel a little emotional as well though, spending another birthday alone. Mostly I don't mind, and even enjoy my solitude, but birthdays always make me ponder my life, and the thought of spending every special occasion alone for the rest of my life is a painful one. Next year I will just have to make sure I take another trip and have a change of scenery.
Sunrise over Pollan Strand.
Sunrise over Pollan Strand.
Blue Skies over Pollan Bay.
Blue Skies over Pollan Bay.
Sunset over Binnion.
Sunset over Binnion.
Sunset over Binnion.
Sunset over Pollan Bay.
Sunrise over the Isle of Doagh.
Sunrise over the Isle of Doagh and Trawbreaga Bay.
Hello my loves, and happy weekend. I hope you're all doing well? I am still hanging in there, thank you again for those of you that have checked up on me, I appreciate you all so much!
Here are some photos and videos from March this year. It was another very wet month, weather wise, but I tried to take advantage of the good weather between the showers and get out on some walks. I had several medical and other appointments to go to, as well as post office runs for my new Vinted obsession, so those were good excuses to get out. I got to see a few friends and catch up with them as well, which is always lovely.
One highlight was discovering Farren's Bar in Carndonagh, a new favourite of mine. It feels like the bar hasn't changed in decades, it really felt like stepping back in time, walking in. They serve food on Fridays, Saturdays, and Mondays, from 12:00 until about 16:00, and it is ABSOLUTELY worth a visit for lunch if you're in the area. They have no online presence, so I can't share a link with you, but if you're looking for some proper home-cooked food, please check them out. They serve three courses for €17.00, which is an incredible deal, and you're bound to meet some interesting local characters in there.
Other than that, I don't have much to tell you. I was/am still struggling with my mental and physical health, which affects every part of my life. Some days it's all I can do to drag my sorry carcass out of bed and feed myself. And while I love the walks I take, they also take it out of me, and I am aching for days afterwards. This is the price I have to pay. I have to plan my weeks around necessary errands, and see whether I'll have enough energy left over to do anything else. The weather might be beautiful, but I can't force myself to go out every day, because I simply don't have the energy. I do enjoy the views from my windows though, as you know.
I try not to let all of this get me down TOO much, but it is difficult. I can't help but grieve for what these illnesses have taken from me. I used to be extremely fit and active. Now, I don't leave the house for days, and sometimes weeks at a time. All I can say is, I am extremely grateful for the internet, and the fact that I am able to keep in touch with people from long distance, because without that, I would be much more isolated.
Hello again my loves. I hope you are all well and happy wherever you are in the world?
I wanted to thank all of you who have reached out to check on me lately, it means so much to me. Please know that when I write personal things on here, it's not for sympathy or attention, but because I believe we should be open about mental health concerns. I think it's very important that we break the stigma and conditioning that most of us were likely raised into. Even now, I have people saying things to me like, "What have you got to be depressed about??" Please. It doesn't work like that!!
Yes, I am lucky to live where I do, and to be surrounded by such natural beauty. But you know what? My brain chemistry doesn't give a fuck about that. Years of trauma and abuse rewires your brain, (this is a scientific fact) and no amount of therapy or medication will fix that. So, I struggle, like so many of us do. And, I speak about my struggles openly, because for most of my life, I wasn't able to. I have had people reach out to me, privately, and thank me for this. Because it helps them to know that they are not alone. I have been told by more than one person, that when they face challenges, they ask, "What would Sinéad do?" - which is immensely flattering, but also a little terrifying. I certainly don't feel like I am any kind of a role model, considering the poor choices I've made in my life, haha! But, if my openness about my struggles helps even one person, then I know it's the right thing to do. And anyone that thinks I am "too much" for sharing, can kindly fuck off.
Anyway, these photos are all from February this year. That was another difficult month for me, particularly around Valentine's Day, and the anniversary of my last break up and heartbreak. It was inevitable that painful emotions would be dredged up, and especially difficult when the whole world seems to be celebrating love in all of the over the top, commercially driven ways. (Yes, I am bitter!) I did get out a few days though, I had some meals with friends, and otherwise tried to get out of the house and distract myself from the painful memories, which were causing me to spiral badly. So, I have a few food pics to share with you, because I was absolutely eating my feelings that month. As always, there are some beautiful views of my surroundings as well. Enjoy!
Inquisitive Sheep, Ardagh.
McFeeley's, Clonmany.
McFeeley's, Clonmany.
McFeeley's, Clonmany.
Delicious Breakfast at Nancy's Barn.
Delicious Breakfast at Nancy's Barn.
Delicious Lunch at Nancy's Barn.
Delicious Breakfast at Corner Cafe, Carndonagh.
Delicious Breakfast at the Market House Cafe, Clonmany.
