Hello my loves. I know it's been forever since I posted, and I apologise. Honestly, this whole year has been a real struggle, and needing to write about difficult topics has made me procrastinate even more so than usual. However, I am going to try to catch up with myself over the next month or so. The fact that I've been in a deep depression for most of the year, and therefore have done far less than usual, means that there are fewer photos and stories to share, so hopefully it won't take me too long. That's something, I guess.
These photos and videos were taken all the way back in January and into the beginning of February. Like I said, I am very far behind! There isn't much to tell you about, really. I went on some walks to the shore and the village, and I survived Storm Eowyn. However, even all these months later, I don't think I will ever truly recover from the emotional storms that have hit me this year. As I mentioned in my last two posts, I knew things had gone wrong with Gareth and myself. We had some extremely difficult conversations over the last couple of weeks in January, and ultimately, I knew it was the beginning of the end.
View over Pollan Bay.
My friends.
Sea and Shore. Pollan Strand.
Sea, Shore, Stones. Pollan Strand.
Sea and Shore. Pollan Strand.
Binnion and Pollan Strand.
Rainbows and rain clouds over Pollan Bay.
Storm Eowyn hit on 24th January 2025, and it was a pretty bad one. I was lucky not to have any damage to my house, though I was without electricity, internet, and phone service for about a day. First world problems though! I always remind myself how lucky we are to even have those services, when these small inconveniences happen. I have a wood stove so I could keep warm, and plenty of food in the house, even if I couldn't make hot meals. I knew that my family in England would be worried about me though, so once the storm died down and I had checked on all the shore houses for the family, I went to the Lodge for a drink and a hot meal. They have generators, so I was able to warm up, and also avail myself of their wifi, so I could check in with people.
That night, I finished reading Curse of the Blood Queen, by JM Lee. Written by an incredibly talented author friend of mine, this will be the first audiobook that I ever work on, and it was very atmospheric to read it by candlelight! (More on my VoiceOver work at a later date.)
Aftermath of Storm Eowyn, Pollan Strand.
No power at home, might as well have a pint! The Lodge.
Reading what will be my first Audiobook by candlelight.
Dramatic clouds over Pollan Bay.
One of my Rook friends soaring over the fields.
Clouds over Glashedy.
Glass of wine at the Ballyliffin Hotel.
Starry night.
Moody skies, Pollan Strand.
Feeling Blue, Pollan Strand.
Feeling Blue, Pollan Strand.
Feeling Blue, Pollan Strand.
Feeling Blue, Pollan Strand.
After such a magical holiday, and the wonderful times spent with family and friends over Christmas, January 2025 was dark and painful. Unfortunately, the rest of the year followed suit. I will try not to be too depressing in my following posts, and at least there will be beautiful views to share, despite my inner darkness.
Well hello again my lovelies, I hope you've had a good week? I have been dealing with a lot still, and am clearly very far behind in my Blog. I'd apologise, but I'm not actually sure that anyone reads this, so it doesn't really matter, does it? If there is actually someone out there reading this, then hi! Thank you for being here. I will share some nice photos and videos just for you.
These images are all from the first two full weeks in January this year. I still had lots of work to catch up on, as well as dealing with withdrawal symptoms because I had to come off one of my medications. Never fun. I did get out of the house a couple of times, to run errands and such. One day, I took a windy walk along the beach. I sat for a while just watching the waves and trying to heal my spirit, but I was filled with immense sadness. I am a very intuitive person, and there have been many times in my life when I just knew something was wrong. I started getting very strong feelings, or premonitions, regarding my relationship with Gareth. I second guessed everything, because I always do. We'd just had an incredible holiday to Sweden and Norway over Christmas, why should I doubt? I blamed the fact that I had had to come off my antidepressants, which is always going to upset your brain chemistry. And yet, I couldn't shake the feeling.
I like to take long walks on the beach and whisper my fears to the wind and waves. Not necessarily hoping for answers, but just as a release. Speaking the fears out loud can help me to process the emotional turmoil, help me to figure out where this pain is coming from. I'm not good at talking to people while I go through things. I've never really had a safe space where I could be vulnerable around people. My emotional needs were never recognised. I was not allowed to cry or express myself as a child. Everyone else's needs took priority, and I was supposed to put them first, always. I was told I was selfish, mean, greedy, even vicious, for trying to set healthy boundaries. When I did attempt to share any painful experiences or emotions, I was told it was my fault. That I deserved it. So. I had to be the strong one, and look after everyone else. I learned that my needs were not important and I should put everyone else first, always. Not at all conducive to healthy relationships in my future. I have spent so many years trying to heal and if not love, then maybe like myself, even a little. It's an ongoing battle.
So. I spoke my fears and doubts to the wind and waves. Sometimes when I do this, I recieve answers and reassurance. This time, they merely echoed my thoughts back to me. A confirmation. 2025 was off to a bad start.
Grey skies over Glashedy.
Sea foam and salt spray, Pollan Strand.
Sea foam and salt spray, Pollan Strand.
Sea foam and salt spray, Pollan Strand.
Sea foam and salt spray, Pollan Strand.
Sea foam and salt spray, Pollan Strand.
Sea foam and salt spray, Pollan Strand.
Searching for blue skies, Pollan Strand.
Rainbow over Pollan Bay.
Rain moving over Pollan Bay.
A sprinkle of snow over Pollan Bay.
These colours keep me going.
Moonset over Binnion.
Sunset over Pollan Bay.
Sunset over Pollan Bay.
Grey clouds over Pollan Bay.
Grey clouds over Pollan Bay.
Stars over Binnion.
And people told me it would be bleak in the winter!
Hello my lovelies, how are you all doing? I know it's been a long time since I've posted, so I hope you are all well and happy. I haven't been doing great lately, this year has been a real struggle for me. My last posts were so full of fun and festive cheer, but I warn you in advance, the next few are likely to be pretty dismal. 2025 has brought me fresh heartache, and I haven't felt up to writing about it all. Still, that will be in a future post. For now, let me catch up with things in order.
These photos are all from the first few days in January. I arrived back in Donegal on New Year's Eve, and spent the first few days of 2025 catching up with sleep and work, and mapping out my goals for the year. All of that meant that I had little energy, but I was fortunate enough to capture some beautiful views from my house, without needing to step outside. The Aurora was quite strong over the first few days, and I got some more colourful photos of that. Nothing like the impressive ribbons and curtains that I witnessed in Sweden of course, but still beautiful nonetheless. I also got some nice photos of rain clouds moving across Pollan Bay, and an impressive rainbow, as well as a perfect pink sunset.
I always feel so fortunate to live where I do, and to have these stunning views to enjoy, no matter how I feel. Some days, those views are all that has kept me going this year. I'm happy to be able to share them with you all too.
